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Brexit Britain, the land dignity forgot

If she wasn’t such a despicable human, you could almost feel sorry for Theresa May. Since becoming Prime Minister she has volunteered herself as a hostage to fortune, no longer in control of anything relating to Brexit, the defining issue of Britain’s next decade, and by extension the only thing upon which her legacy will be judged. The real tragedy is that like all good … Continue reading Brexit Britain, the land dignity forgot

Post-Brexit, Faragenstein’s Monster is running amok

The EU referendum has unleashed a host of profoundly unpleasant things. Nigel Farage being happy. Louise Mensch being happy. Katie Hopkins being happy. Basically, obnoxious bigots being happy. But worse than that, it has created an immigration-hating monster that is laying waste to the political centre ground, spreading across Westminster like a plague of turds. If mainstream political parties aren’t willing to stand up for … Continue reading Post-Brexit, Faragenstein’s Monster is running amok

Mad as Mad Houses

The government is about to spend £2bn throwing petrol onto a housing market that is already on fire. It is just one example of a central government housing policy designed to convert scarce public resources into votes at the ballot box, regardless of whether they exacerbate the very housing crisis the government should be trying to solve. It is divisive, unjust and economically reckless. The total disregard for the waste of public resources required to fund these lunatic schemes should shame a government which boasts loudly about its economic prudence. That they seem to genuinely not care should be cause for national outrage. Continue reading “Mad as Mad Houses”

The Corbyn Experiment

It’s too soon to pull the ripcord on the Corbyn Experiment

The first three months of Jeremy Corbyn’s leadership of the Labour Party have felt like several sleepless decades being waterboarded in Guantanamo Bay. But while his media coverage is a horror show and each week brings fresh calamity for the party, it also hasn’t been the total disaster many predicted. The reality is it’s too early, and too self-defeating, to pull the ripcord on the Corbyn Experiment. There is value in giving the experiment a better chance. To do this Corbyn needs to take seriously his major weakness so far – that of basic competence. For the rest of the Parliamentary Labour Party and its members, the only option is unity.

The three months since September 10th have been the political equivalent of a dinner party with a couple hopelessly trapped in a loveless marriage. What started fairly amicably is now a bitter, furious row as years of seething resentment rise uncontrollably to the surface. It’s awkward and uncomfortable for everyone else at the table but the point of no return has been passed. Past indiscretions are spat out like molten lava from a volcano, inextinguishable by mere social etiquette. People have long stopped thinking about the kids. Things have been said that cannot be unsaid. Personal dignity is no longer a meaningful concern. It will take a lot more than a bunch of flowers or a trip to Relate to patch this one up. Continue reading “The Corbyn Experiment”

David Cameron’s Killer Summer

David Cameron had a better summer than you, and there is nothing you can do about it

Imagine the best summer you have ever had. Now imagine it as a number. It’s probably a big number. Now multiply it by your age, add on every person you have ever had a sexual thought about on public transport, then multiply it again by the national debt created by debt-hating George Osborne since 2010 (£540bn, since you ask).

Now imagine this number as a summer. You may not be religious, but even if you are not, this number probably looks pretty much like heaven. In this heaven, maybe England won the Ashes 180,000-0. Maybe it was so sunny that evil simply evaporated from the world. Maybe not one single night out ended with the misery of a pot noodle and a wank. Yet this perfect summer, this most glorious of summers, is still no-where near as good as David Cameron’s summer. He has once again beaten you into the ground, as he does with everything, and there is frankly nothing you can do it about it. Continue reading “David Cameron’s Killer Summer”